THAILAND

APOLOGIES TO OUR DEDICATED FOLLOWERS BUT AFTER A DRUNKEN NIGHT OUT WITH HIS FRIENDS PAUL STUPIDLY LEFT OUR LAPTOP POWER CORD IN LONDON. AS A RESULT WE'VE BEEN UNABLE TO USE OUR LAPTOP FOR THE PAST TWO WEEKS. THANKS TO THE HEROIC EFFORTS OF CHRIS LYONS WE NOW HAVE A POWER CORD AND NORMAL SERVICE SHOULD RESUME. PAUL ADMITS HE IS AN ASS.

WHERE: Chang Mail, Bangkok, Adaman Islands
WHERE (less detailed): Thailand

WEATHER IS: Gorgeously hot.
DAYS: 166-181
FOOD IS: tasty and cheap, cheap, cheap. When a plate of Pad Thai costs £1 and a plate of Thai Green Curry with rice costs a little more you know have no chance of staying off the carbs.

PEOPLE ARE: hassle-free. Thanks to the million and one tourists who have enjoyed Thailand before us we are no longer objects of curiosity nor walking ATM machines.

HIGHLIGHTS/LOWLIGHTS: Chiang Mai, the city with nearly as many temples as 7-11 stores ...Rhaani finds the perfect B&B: comfy beds, delicious museli and the crime channel tv station....despite the mid-day heat we walk around town visiting the top 6 temples, then reward ourselves with some fresh passion fruit slushies...

....we also discover the delights of Thailands original 20p Red Bull bottles... we polish up on our culinary skills with a Thai cooking class... visiting Te night market where Paul says he wants to buy a small coin carrying storage unit (a purse says Rhaani)... our three-in-one adventure tour turns out to consist of the lamest White water rafting, the crappest jungle trek (ending at a backgarden water feature/waterfall) and the best elephant ride - cos Rhaani got to sit on the elephants head and feed him banana's from there...

...fly into Phuket, despite this being the place where Kate Moss and Sienna Miller holiday we soon discover it is a complete turd-hole and somewhere to avoid at all costs (especially Patong Beach)...Ko Lanta and Rhaani gets some home comfort with the arrival of Ma Bear and Johnny Boy...relaxing on Li-Los in the Andaman Ocean... Debs shows where Rhaani gets her Evil Kinevil spirit from as she drives her scooter into a ditch, amazingly she escapes with only a few cuts and bruises... snorkelling and Debs is shocked when she discovers a man who can speak 7-languages cannot speak Swahili...

...Ko Yao Yai our luxury resort on one of thailands few remaining undeveloped islands boasts an infinity pool with a stunning view, but ruins the feel-good factor by charging for internet... after 10-days of being spoiled rotten we say goodbye to the folks and fly onto Bangkok... we extend taking in the magnificent temples which Rhaani declares far superior to Chang Mai... a cut-price water cruise... standing to attention during the national anthem in one of Bangkoks luxury cinemas (although Paul contends they can't be called luxury as they fail to offer any pic'n'mix)...

...fighting for bargains at the MBK shopping centre... checking into the dwarf friendly Dream hotel where we counted 5 dwarves on attendance...spending 3hrs to get to the must-visit-even-though-you-know-it's-a-tourist-trap Floatings Markets, which were pretty crappy... a quiet farewell drink on our last night in Asia turns into a classic bender as we meet up with our travel buddy Brian...