PANAMA CITY

Blending in at the Panama Canal

WHERE: PANAMA CITY
WHERE (less detailed): capital of Panama

the best thing about having no expectations is that you're always pleasantly surprised

WEATHER IS: humid with violent rain followed by sunshine. Muggy and hot throughout.
DAYS: t-74 to 72.

even just by ordinary streets

FOOD IS: while the lobster and shrimps served above the local fish market was a real let-down we turned things around with some outstanding sushi in the old town.
PEOPLE ARE: the locals are friendly but still unwilling to look at maps. At night we enjoyed the company of our heavy drinking fellow sailors from the San Blas Islands catamaran trip.

or not so ordinary buildings

DID YOU KNOW: the average price paid by boats to sail through the canal is $30,000. The smallest amount was $0.36 paid by American swimmer Richard Halliburton to swim through it.

HIGHLIGHTS/LOWLIGHTS: simply being able to stand up on after spending 4hrs squashed in the boot seat of a 4x4 on our way to Panama City ... certainly not opening our backpacks to find the torrential rain during the drive had soaked all our clothes and nearly ruined two of Rhaanis favorite t-shirts... the unusual but still delicious Caesar Salad sushi served in a picturesque square in the old town ... the accompanying apple martini's and best bottle of Sav Blanc enjoyed in South America ... the Panama Canal and hearing how "thousands of workers valiantly gave their lives to ensure the success of the project" I thought China had a good line of propaganda ....

thousands died so that a ruddy big boat could take a short-cut

... watching a container vessel be lowered through the Miraflores lock part of the canal ... the surprisingly beautiful architecture of Panama old town. Arriving with next to no expectations we were delightfully surprised to see that old Panama City is a Havana-lite place ... The interesting architecture of modern Panama City's financial area ... certainly not Paul's fruitless search for an open Taco Bell restaurant ... the $1 a bottle of beer happy hour offer at Oldies bar with a classic 80s soundtrack.

certainly not the 137 to Oxford Street

UP NEXT: a 27hr bus/bus/ferry/bus journey that takes us on a whistlestop tour of San Jose, Costa Rica and lands us beachside for 7-days of surf and yoga.

COLOMUBIA to PANAMA

kippers for breakfast?

WHERE: the San Blas islands Catamaran tour
WHERE (less detailed): getting from Colombia (South America) to Panama (Central America)

our sturdy vessel and home for 4-days

WHY: because flying from Colombia to Panama or Costa Rica is obscenely expensive, £400-ish for a 2hr flight which often will swing down to Ecuador to pick up a few more passengers.
DAYS: t-78 to t-75

pirate of the Caribbean

WEATHER IS: fortunately for us near perfect. A few hours suffered from heavy rain while a few more suffered from overpowering sunshine. For Hoolie she just suffered after falling asleep on-deck within hours of boarding the boat she spent rest of the trip with a beetroot red face that would scare small children into sleeping with factor 40 sunblock on.

"Did you not think about putting some sun tan lotion on?" asks Rhaani in a classic Horse, door, stables, bolted moment.

"I reiterate, this trip is not just one big holiday, it's hard work at times, obviously just not this time."

FOOD IS: awful. Coming into the trip we had expectations of fresh fish every day and healthy vegetable based meals. Instead we were forced to witness first hand how it is possible to cram three different types of carbohydrates into one meal. The scrambled eggs for breakfast were nice though.

and admittedly this wasn't our toughest hour, but it's still hard work

DID YOU KNOW: their are 365 islands in the San Blas region.
PEOPLE ARE: having shared a hostel with our future shipmates we (i.e Paul) were concerned at their 20hrs drinking a day policy (Rhaani was more concerned about them being uncouth Aussie Okkers) ... Paul's concern proved warranted as they downed rum/vodka/beer, like water, while Rhaani's concern proved unwarranted ... Pauls survival plan of hiding in the bathroom for 4-days was undone by shared bathrooms and a 6hr passport delay that meant the opening drinking session started at 11am the first day and required an impromptu visit to a local supermarket to replenish supplies ... in the end thanks to light Colombian beer Paul was able to hang out with the rest of the group without destroying himself or his liver ... Rhaani and Julie demolish their 5 bottles of wine plus beer and vodka with alarming ease.

not a bad pic considering it was taken with a non-water resistant camera while Paul stood in four feet of water

HIGHLIGHTS/LOWLIGHTS: the morning of day3 when we woke up to the jaw-dropping view of tiny, white beached, palm tree swamped Caribbean islands... finally being allowed to jump off the Catamaran into the open water ... night4's, rum and vodka fresh fruit punch that put hairs on Rhaanis chest ... not being allowed to buy the boatful of lobsters and crabs offered to us by local fishermen after our captain declared they were caught out of season ... Sun-baking on deck with beer in hand as we cruised the Caribbean ... certainly not the news that all x3 of us would be sleeping in a cramped, air-less double bed cabin - Paul takes evasive action and sleeps on deck for the remainder of the trip ... Certainly not the news that we were expected to help out by taking a 1hr nocturnal look-out shift - Paul risks the wrath of Rhaani by sleeping through their shared 2-3am watch duty ... the general amusement at watching the alpha males depart with spear guns and fishing rods and returning empty handed for x5 days in a row ... certainly not the food.

Robinson Tweedale and girl Friday

UP NEXT: PANAMA CITY.

CARTAGENA

cliche, glorious cliche

WHERE:CARTAGENA (pronounced Carta-Hena by everyone but us it seemed)
WHERE (less detailed): north Colombia on the Caribbean coast

one last square Julie?

WEATHER IS: humid but at least the rain has stopped

FOOD IS: Paul declares the lobster curry he enjoys to be one of the best meals he's ever had. Another garlic shrimp offering was outstanding and great value at £4 for a 2-course meal. In fact even the pizza here was good.

All Along the Watchtower

PEOPLE ARE: Beautiful. By far the most attractive in Sourh America, although compared to Bolivian and Peruvian this isn't hard. Years of breeding between African slaves and Spanish settlers has created a coffee-skinned master race with big breasts and bottoms and skinny hips and legs. I'm sure they're equally impressed by our alabaster pallor. Shouting also seems to be the order of the day with raised voices competing with reggae/calipso music to fill the air.

HIGHLIGHTS/LOWLIGHTS: arriving off the back of a scheduled 12hr actual 24hr bus journey it's amazing we consider anything a highlight. We officially declare ourselves "over" buses after clocking up over 7 solid-days worth of bus journeys during our time in South America. How this will fit in with the numerous necessary bus rides in Central America is anyones guess...

stepping out in Cartagena

... Things go from bad to worse when we finally arrive at our hostel to discover our room neither has air conditioning or a lock on our door ... a Paul strop later we check into a hostel around the corner with air-con, cable TV and a lock on the door... the next day, after a good night's sleep, Cartagena soon establishes itself as our favorite Colombian city....

Cartagena old town certainly impresses

... Despite Hoolies declaration that she's no longer interested in churches or colonial squares even she's won over by the beauty of Cartagena... the great food is aided by a nearby giant shopping centre complete with massive supermarket and an air-conditioned cinema showing The Hangover 2( or Que Pasa 2 as it's known over here) in English for only £4 ... Delightful daquiris but murdered mojitos in the old town... with the heat rising we hat-up with a selection of hatwear - Panama, Pork Pie and Cowboy - to protect us from the sun... watching with wonder as a shopkeeper locks us inside her store as half the town chases a thief through the streets while brandishing machetes...

rough justice - Colombian style

... The poor fool takes refuge in a shop and keeps the mob at bay until the police arrive ... discovering were not the only ones to appreciate Cartagena as a film set is erected in the town ...

hats off to the extras who stayed in costume in 40degree heat

UP NEXT: a four-night, 5-day passage to Panama on the high seas.

SAN GIL

Is it a bird, is it a plane?

WHERE: SAN GIL

 what nerves

WHERE (less detailed): central Colombia - supposedly home to Colombia's burgeoning adventure tourism industry.
WHY: because we paid an additional insurance premium to allow Paul to do white water rafting and so he's doing it whether he likes it or not.

Barrichara - the places you have to put up with when you're waiting to white water raft

WEATHER IS: dreadful. The longest and heaviest rainy season has swollen the rivers making water rafting impossible.
FOOD IS: limited to Gringo Mikes sandwich shop. Which makes very hearty sandwiches in fairness.

possibly the best cookie in all of South America

PEOPLE ARE: at a loss of what to do. The whole town is focussed on adventure sports. With these off a lot of locals are twiddling their thumbs


the reason why bus journeys take so long in Colombia

HIGHLIGHTS/LOWLIGHTS: white-water rafting - CANCELLED, waterfall rappelling - CANCELLED, waterfall diving - CANCELLED. Rhaani and Julie did enjoy a 30min paragliding adventure although any hopes of sharing the experience ends when the wind dies and Julie is forced to wait 40mins until taking off ... life's not all bad as we discover Gringo Mikes fresh, homemade, choc chip cookies... even Barrichara grates as we grow tired of yet another quaint spagetti western colonial town.

Paul - not white water rafting

UP NEXT: Cartagena